I was laying in bed last night wondering why I was unable to sleep, when I realized it was because I had my back to the door. Silly, right? Wait until you hear why that is such a big deal.
When I was six, my dad built a doll house for me as a Christmas gift. Now, this wasn't any old doll house. This doll house was a 5 foot tall, 6 foot wide log cabin doll house. It was (and is) amazing. Except at night when it absolutely terrified me. I spent every night as a child, and quite frankly teenager, terrified that someone was hiding behind it. I would lay awake for hours every night scared to death that someone was going to sneak out from behind it and attack me. In middle school I kept my tennis racket by the door of my bedroom so that when we got home from church late at night I could grab it and check behind the doll house (this fear, by the way, extended itself to the shower curtain, as well). Early on in the history of the doll house I decided it would be best to sleep facing towards it. That way if anyone did come out from behind it I would see them immediately. Even if that side of my body had grown numb, I would not roll over. Years after I had finished playing with dolls the doll house became a book case. At this point it was moved closer to the wall, and I put my tennis racket into semi-retirement, but my fear and paranoia persisted. Even now as I approach the ripe old age of 24, the dark still scares me. I suppose it has something to do with the unknown, the hidden. Even now that I don't sleep alone (my 6'4" husband and two dogs take up alot of space and do more than their fair share of snoring) I still have trouble sleeping at night. Apparently life-long habits are hard to break...
When I was six, my dad built a doll house for me as a Christmas gift. Now, this wasn't any old doll house. This doll house was a 5 foot tall, 6 foot wide log cabin doll house. It was (and is) amazing. Except at night when it absolutely terrified me. I spent every night as a child, and quite frankly teenager, terrified that someone was hiding behind it. I would lay awake for hours every night scared to death that someone was going to sneak out from behind it and attack me. In middle school I kept my tennis racket by the door of my bedroom so that when we got home from church late at night I could grab it and check behind the doll house (this fear, by the way, extended itself to the shower curtain, as well). Early on in the history of the doll house I decided it would be best to sleep facing towards it. That way if anyone did come out from behind it I would see them immediately. Even if that side of my body had grown numb, I would not roll over. Years after I had finished playing with dolls the doll house became a book case. At this point it was moved closer to the wall, and I put my tennis racket into semi-retirement, but my fear and paranoia persisted. Even now as I approach the ripe old age of 24, the dark still scares me. I suppose it has something to do with the unknown, the hidden. Even now that I don't sleep alone (my 6'4" husband and two dogs take up alot of space and do more than their fair share of snoring) I still have trouble sleeping at night. Apparently life-long habits are hard to break...
7 comments:
And Matt laughs at me for not being able to rearrange my room so that my bed faces the wrong way! I have issues with the shower curtain too, but only when I'm on the other side of it. You never know who could sneak up on you while you're in there!
Well let me tell you about my routine every night when I come back to my apartment from Karen's. First, after unlocking my door I flip on the light switch in a hurry, then crouch to look under my bed all the way to the wall. Then, assured that no one is under there (and don't forget that that DID happen to a UTM student in the dorms this semester!) I go to the closet and have a look around. Finally, I go to the bathroom and check behind the door (assuming any secret attacker is thin enough to fit behind it closed, and then peer back behind the shower curtain before getting on with my life.
I scarred you for life!
All these years you've lived in fear of the dollhouse?!?!?! WHY didn't you say something? We could have gotten rid of it!! ~ Mom
I liked it way too much!
Wow. These were eye-opening. I can't say that I still do these things, but I used to. I had problems with my shower curtain and under my bed for quite a while. I also was in fear of the toybox my grandaddy made for me. It was about 5 feet long and 4 feet deep. I used to hide in it and pop out to scare people...then I realized someone might do it back to me, so I stopped. I had creepy curiosities about my closet too. Oh! and when I was really litte...ok, it was yesterday...I used to turn on my room light and leap onto my bed from the doorway (it wasn't too far) because I didn't want hands coming out to grab my ankles.
But I haven't done any of that for a long time.
Very interesting comments! Well, I'm glad that you are cautious and aware that there are some kooky people in this world that could do you harm but......I do remember being scared when I was young that someone may be in my closet, but I was over that by about age 8. Guess it is a good thing I'm not fearful since I live all alone in a house with lots of rooms and closets!... Blair, my mother tells stories of her brother that would hide under her bed and grab her ankles at night when she crawled in. Don't think it scarred her for life though!
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